For very woman who has wanted to be strong/er

Who among us has not spend a moment or two feeling tired, over wrought, overwhelmed, inadequate to the demands of the situation, feeling just not enough, feeling weak? Well, for those of us who have, I offer up this most wonderful of poems by Marge Piercy.  May it touch your heart with a gentle hand, even as it binds up your wounds and strengthens your soul!

For strong women by Marge Piercy

 

A strong woman is a woman who is straining.

A strong woman is a woman standing

on tip toe and lifting a barbell

while trying to sing Boris Godunov.

A strong woman is a woman at work

cleaning out the cesspool of the ages,

and while she shovels, she talks about

how she doesn’t mind crying, it opens

the ducts of her eyes, and throwing up

develops the stomach muscles, and

she goes on shoveling with tears in her nose.

 

A strong woman is a woman in whose head

a voice is repeating, I told you so,

ugly, bad girl, bitch, nag, shrill, witch,

ballbuster, nobody will ever love you back,

why aren’t you feminine, why aren’t

you soft, why aren’t you quiet, why

aren’t you dead?

 

A strong woman is a woman determined

to do something others are determined

not to be done. She is pushing up on the bottom

of a lead coffin lid. She is trying to raise

a manhole cover with her head, she is trying

to butt her way though a steel wall.

Her head hurts. People waiting for the hole

to be made say, hurry, you’re so strong.

 

A strong woman is a woman bleeding

inside. A strong woman is a woman making

herself strong every morning while her teeth

loosen and her back throbs. Every baby,

a tooth, midwives used to say, and now

every battle a scar. A strong woman

is a mass of scar tissue that aches

when it rains and wounds that bleed

when you bump them and memories that get up

in the night and pace in boots to and fro.

 

A strong woman is a woman who craves love

like oxygen or she turns blue choking.

A strong woman is a woman who loves

strongly and weeps strongly and is strongly

terrified and has strong needs. A strong woman is strong

in words, in action, in connection, in feeling;

she is not strong as a stone but as a wolf

sucking her young. Strength is not in her, but she

enacts it as the wind fills a sail.

 

What comforts her is other’s loving

her equally for the strength and for the weakness

from which it issues, lightning from a cloud.

Lightning stuns. In rain, the clouds disperse.

Only water of connection remains,

flowing through us. Strong is what we make together,

a strong woman is a woman strongly afraid.

On Learning from His All Holiness Ecumenical Patriarch Bartholomew about ecology

The other day I was at a Greek Festival, and yes we were there for the food. But after I had eaten all of the baklava any one human being could possibly ingest in one day I set off to explore the various and sundry tables where concessionaires were hawking their wares.  As I prowled, I came across a woman who was ‘selling’ solar energy. As a nod to her location at the festival, she had two placards with quotes from His All-Holiness Ecumenical Patriarch Bartholomew. Of course given the sheltered life that I live, I was unfamiliar with this particular Patriarch of the Orthodox Church and his commitment to the environment. . . .  I do have a lot to learn!  And what a joy that I do. So, here is some of what His All-Holiness Ecumenical Patriarch has to say:

Climate Change and Social Justice

“If human beings were to treat one another’s personal property the way they treat the natural environment, we would view that behavior as anti-social and illegal. We would expect legal sanctions and even compensation. When will we learn that to commit a crime against the natural world is also a sin?”

“The way we respond to the natural environment is directly reflects the way we treat human beings. The willingness to exploit the environment is revealed in the willingness to permit avoidable human suffering. So the survival of the natural environment is also the survival of ourselves. When we will understand that a crime against nature is a crime against ourselves and sin against God?”

Poverty, Protection and Preservation

“Poverty is not caused by the lack of material resources. It is the immediate result of our exploitation and waste. There is a close link between the economy of the poor and the warming of our planet. Conservation and compassion are intimately connected. The web of life is a sacred gift of God — ever so precious, yet ever so delicate. Each of us dwells within the wider ecosystem; each of us is a part of a larger, global environment. We must serve our neighbor and preserve our world with both humility and generosity, in a perspective of frugality and solidarity.”

“All of us have to work, each from his or her own place in the world; indeed, we must work together, irrespective of religious conviction, racial origin, and professional discipline. Our efforts will remain meaningless and fruitless if they remain fragmented and isolated. For, the protection of the world’s natural beauty is one consideration, one concern, one song, to the glory of God and all creation.”

“Climate change is much more than an issue of environmental preservation. Insofar as human-induced, it is a profoundly moral and spiritual problem. To persist in our current path of ecological destruction is not only folly. It is suicidal because it jeopardizes the diversity of our planet. Moreover, climate change constitutes a matter of social and economic justice. For, those who will most directly and severely be affected by climate change will be the poorer and more vulnerable nations (what Christian Scriptures refer to as our “neighbor”) as well as the younger and future generations (the world of our children, and of our children’s children).”

Healing and Repentance

“It is a qualitative element of our faith that we believe in and accept a Creator, who fashioned the world out of love, making and calling it “very good.” Tending to and caring for this creation is not a political whim or a social fashion. It is a divine commandment; it is a religious obligation. It is no less than the will of God that we leave as light a footprint on our environment.”

“It is never too late. God’s world has incredible healing powers; and human choices can change the tide in global warming. Within a single generation, we could steer earth toward our children’s future. With God’s blessing and help, that generation can begin now. For the first time in the history of our world, we recognize that our decisions and choices directly impact the environment. It is up to us to shape our future; it is up to us to choose our destiny. Breaking the vicious circle of ecological degradation is a choice with which we are uniquely endowed, at this crucial moment in the history of our planet.”

“Ecology cannot inspire respect for nature if it does not express a different worldview from the one that prevails in our culture today, from the one that led us to this ecological impasse in the first place. What is required is an act of repentance, a change in our established ways, a renewed image of ourselves, one another and the world around us within the perspective of the divine design for creation. To achieve this transformation, what is required is nothing less than a radical reversal of our perspectives and practices.”

Fear and Love

“It should not be fear of impending disaster with regard to global change that obliges us to change our ways with regard to the natural environment. Rather, it should be a recognition of the cosmic harmony and original beauty that exists in the world. We must learn to make our communities more sensitive and to render our behavior toward nature more respectful. We must acquire a compassionate heart – what St. Isaac of Syria, a seventh century mystic once called a heart that burns with love for the whole of creation: for humans, for birds and beasts, for all God’s creatures.”

“The fundamental criterion for an ecological ethic is not individualistic or commercial. It is deeply spiritual. For, the root of the environmental crisis lies in human greed and selfishness. What is asked of us is not greater technological skill, but deeper repentance for our wrongful and wasteful ways. What is demanded is a sense of sacrifice, which comes with cost but also brings about fulfillment. Only through such self-denial, through our willingness sometimes to forgo and to say “no” or “enough” will we rediscover our true human place in the universe.”

Sacrifice and Waste

“This sacrifice for the sake of sharing means learning to give, and not simply to give up. It is learning to share and to connect with others and with the natural world. It is a way of loving, of moving gradually away from what I want to what God’s world needs. It is liberation from fear, greed and compulsion. It is regaining a sense of wonder, being filled with a sense of goodness, seeing all things in God, and God in all things.”

“If we are guilty of relentless waste, it is because we have lost the spirit of worship. We are no longer respectful pilgrims on this earth; we have been reduced to careless consumers or passing travelers. This spiritual vision of worship guides us to a life that sees more clearly and shares more fairly, moving away from what we want individually to what the world needs globally. Then, we begin to value everything for its place in creation and not simply its economic value to us, thereby restoring the original beauty of the world, seeing all things in God and God in all things.”

“We have been commanded to taste of the world’s fruits, not to waste them; we have been commissioned to care for the world, not to waste it. When Christ fed the multitudes with a few loaves and fish on a hill in Palestine, he instructed his disciples to “gather up all of the remaining fragments, so that nothing may be lost.” (John 6.12) This instruction should serve as a model in a time of wasteful consumption, where even the refuse of affluent societies can nourish entire populations.”

From https://www.patriarchate.org/bartholomew-quotes

On mirror gazing

So I was reading this book “The Hidden Lamp” which is a compilation of stories about Buddhist Awakened women.  Lots of very cool stories that make me want to stop, scratch my chin and think for a bit. And when I do, I often find myself looking at the world just a little bit differently.

The story du jour is about a convent where the abbess would meditate in front of a great mirror in order to see into her own nature.  Over time each generation of nuns would meditate in front of the mirror concentrating on the question “Where is a single feeling, a single thought, in the mirror image at which I gaze?” The good sisters were searching for the purpose of their lives, looking to discover who they were as human beings.

Well reading that story got me to remembering a moment in my life when I was maybe in junior high school, maybe 7th or 8th grade, so just about 12 or 13 years old, just starting to realize that there was something to this becoming a young woman stuff.  I was in a small department store with my mother, wandering around waiting for her to be finished with whatever it was she was doing, and I walked past the jewelry counter. Of course there was a mirror on the counter that caught my eye – that is exactly what mirrors in department stores are supposed to do. I remember looking into it and noticing the zits on my chin – remember I was just barely 13 and not really conscious of much at that point in my life. So, just as I’m starting to notice these fatal flaws on my face, the sales person puts her hand over the mirror, moves it away and says to my mother, something like “these girls are so full of themselves all they want to do is look at their pretty faces.”  Funny, I never really resonated to the pretty faces part. Truth be told, I don’t think of my self as particularly pretty. I’ve always thought of my self as someone people liked because I have “a nice personality” but, anyway, what I resonated to was the critique of looking in the mirror.  So the story about this meditation resonated with me.

The commentary on the meditation included notes from a contemporary Buddhist practitioner who took up the meditation for a week. She brilliantly describes the her distractions from the first several days.  By the seventh day she was able to look into the mirror and see a courageous woman who was at least willing to look at herself.

And that really resonated for me. It took me from being critiqued for being curious about what I look like to an affirmation that it is not only OK, but a good think to take a good long look at who you are – and to find some peace and comfort in it.

So, maybe we should all try this?  Have a look at yourself in the mirror – 5 minutes a day for a week. What do you see? What are your reactions?  Do remember to look with the eyes of compassion!

In celebration of Flamingos

Ah, flamingos! Those bright pink birds that signal summer time – summer time anytime of the year.  There is just something about them that touches my heart and makes me smile.  I LOVE pink flamingos – you know the glow in the dark plastic ones that the word kitsch was invented to describe. Yes, I LOVE, LOVE, LOVE them!  There is just something about them that makes me want to stand up just a little taller, put my hand on my hip, grin an half grin, and say, “lead me no into temptation? Hell no! Don’t bother, I am the short cut!”  Somehow I look at a pink flamingo and I find myself channeling Mae West and Yogi Berra all rolled into one.

So, you know I was so very sad earlier this summer when I learned that Don Featherstone had died. At the ripe old age of 21 when Mr. Featherstone was working for Union Products in Massachusetts, he invented the pink flamingo lawn ornament for his company. Imagine! At 21! What insight! What genius! What joy he brought to the world! . . . well, to me anyway.

So, here’s to you Mr. Featherstone! May you rest in joy, cradled in appreciation for the color and delight you brought to our world!

And here’s to the flamingo! A gregarious wading bird, child of the crane family, symbol of individuality and balance (go watch one calmly standing in the water on one foot), always outgoing and maybe just a little flirtatious, ever true to self while loyal to the flock – flamingos like swans mate for life.  I have read that the spirit of the flamingo is a healer of the heart and of emotional imbalances – and who can’t use a little bit of healing and emotional balance in their lives?

In the spirit of perpetual summer, let us all raise a glass with a little umbrella in it to Don Featherstone and the pink flamingo!!

 

Song of Creation

The other day I was driving along on a side road and I saw a sign advertising a Jefferson Starship concert. I pulled off to the side of the road and stared at the sign. Then I got my cell phone out and checked, and yes it was still 2015, but some iteration of Jefferson Starship was indeed still performing.

Now, to appreciate the significance of this for me, you have to realize that Jefferson Airplane, the group from which Jefferson Starship evolved, was my most all-time favorite group in the universe. I really wanted to be Grace Slick (their lead singer) when I grew up. Then I realized that in order to be Grace Slick I would need to have self-confidence and be able to sing with full throated exuberance.  Two strikes, so I set that dream aside.

But still, Jefferson Starship still performing in 2015! And then, of course, some of their tunes started to play in my head.  “You are the sound of creation.”  And then I thought, no, it is “you are the soul of creation.” And then I thought “you are the song of creation.” And then I thought, “Oh, just go google it.” So I found the lyrics.  Not sound nor soul nor song, but crown. “You are the crown of creation.” Recorded by Jefferson Airplane 47 years ago in 1968. Sung by yours truly on way too many car trips, with the windows rolled up nice a tight – because if the car windows are rolled up, no one can see you or hear you, right?

Anyway, I hope you enjoy this little trip down memory lane ….

 

“Crown of Creation” Jefferson Airplane 1968

 

You are the crown of creation.

You are the crown of creation,

And you’ve got no place to go.

 

Soon you’ll attain the stability you strive for,

In the only way that it’s granted:

In a place among the fossils of our time.

 

In loyalty to their kind

They cannot tolerate our minds.

In loyalty to our kind

We cannot tolerate their obstruction!

 

Life is change.

How it differs from the rocks.

I’ve seen their ways too often for my liking.

New worlds to gain.

My life is to survive and be alive

for you.

 

You know that being who I am now, I have to ponder the lyrics for a bit – just a little bit. But, think about it. To be the crown of creation – the crown, the summit, the culmination, that is something, yes? And, life is change. Would that we could remember that! Change really is the only constant. We are the crown of creation, an ongoing every changing creation. Nice, yes? But hang on for the ride, because changes are rarely smooth or easy. But, oh my they can be fun and exciting! So, in the spirit of Manny Gordon: Enjoy, Enjoy, Enjoy!!!